Shacknews LoL

Grief and dealing with it

What a weird club to be a part of. I'm trying to handle it as best as I can. And I know that that's all I can do for a while. Just simply getting up, making a coffee, getting showered and dressed... all seems 2x harder that it did before.

I'm not sleeping great. I'll take sleeping pills which sort of help, but really trying not to rely on them. I just asked for my GP to prescribe me some valium, because those seemed to do a lot better than sleeping pills. She did warn me about being dependent on them, so I'll be sure to tread carefully with that.

I started seeing a psychologist. Therapy was never something I did before. I always considered myself a "happy, cheery" person. Sure, life gets challenging, but never to the point where I needed to see someone professional to talk about dealing with them. I've only had a few sessions so far, but I'm committed to continuing to see it through and seeing if it'll impact my life and help me get through this difficult time.

Since the day my husband passed, I haven't been alone at our place. I've always had friends or family staying here. But the last of my family just went back to the US, and for the first time, I'm alone in our place, in this country. I've never not lived here without him. I haven't lived on my own since college! People have asked if I'm moving back to the US and to be honest, it's hard to make that decision. I'm so entangled with life here now - financially, socially... it's not easy to step away from it all.

Anyway, apologies for this sudden post. I feel like now that I'm alone, I'm trying to grab on to any one or community for support. In saying that, I want to say a huge THANK YOU to this community, for expressing their thoughts and condolences. I want to give you all a big virtual hug.

Oh, and if someone can recommend a good easy-going game (PS5/Switch) to start, that would be great. I just finished Astro Bot and that was super pleasant to play through. I just wish my husband was beside me to watch me play :(

Say hello to the newest little shacker, Elora!

https://i.imgur.com/wXqrleB.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/oqux1V3.jpg

She's a good little girl, happy in her babybjorn carrier so I can still play Phantom Liberty!

Rosie was dehydrated, had no fur, malnutritioned, and covered in bug bites when i found her 16 years ago in corpus christi texas. Rosie you were a great one and will be dearly missed.

https://i.imgur.com/7BjtwjE.jpg

^^sleeping

Hello world! Ruby Belle born 2:41am.

Mom and baby both doing great. :)

https://i.imgur.com/nXufYNJ.jpg

This is #2. Anyone know a good urologist in the Eau Claire area?

Earlier today, I gave notice at my job; my last day is Friday. New job will mean an effective 10% raise in salary, after not getting a raise in the 1.5yrs I was there. I leave behind Java stack development & re-enter the world of .NET, which will be nice.

An hour ago, my 18yr old cat Moose passed away. The apartment already feels emptier without him, but I'm glad his suffering is over (he'd been fighting chronic kidney disease, lymphoma, anemia, and weight loss).

https://imgur.com/gCfSXox
https://i.imgur.com/Fh3vIxB.jpg

It's certainly been a day.

Hug your pets y'all :(

We made the awful decision to put our senior rescue dog down today.

I'd originally typed out the whole story but it doesn't matter. I'm happy she's not in pain anymore.

RIP Irene.

Welp, today I join the ranks of those laid off. =/

The only time the mass ever came up was her freshman year she had her MRI and we were waiting for results and the principal at her school said in an assembly something like “unless you have a brain tumor you better be here.”

But also once she got to high school she has had seizures once again. She’s left school in an ambulance multiple times. Once they lost her for 45 minutes - she was out cold on the floor in the restroom. She just wrapped up her junior year and this summer she was headed to one year seizure free.

Unfortunately she’s had at least 6 grand mal seizures we know about. She’s gone to the ER twice from work (she has lost that job for safety reasons - she was a lifeguard). And then tonight - in the middle of game night - she went from 0 to Seizure instantly. I barely caught her falling out her chair. My wife and I were supposed to be in Kansas City but our concert canceled so I was home, she was home. I’m so glad my wife was there because I stayed calm, called 911 as I was told, but I hadn’t seen her have a seizure in 11 years or more. All I could see was my baby girl shaking and foaming. My wife got her emergency meds onboard and she was stable before EMS got there. No hospital. A few hours later she was up and about. A few hours after that she was 100%. She will sleep hard for about 18 hours now.

But I won’t sleep tonight, most likely. Unless I can blank my mind with something and just let exhaustion take over. She’s ok - but actually seeing it - I’m shook. And the part I’ve always hated is right here again - I can’t fix this. I fix things. I reason through things. I have nothing here.

Kitty Post

Everyone likes Kitties right? We ended up adopting the entire litter as we couldn't bring ourselves to split these three up.

https://i.imgur.com/uY7I3XE.jpg
https://i.imgur.com/Ppmmy9Q.jpg
https://i.imgur.com/gSeWDSR.jpg
https://i.imgur.com/f7FJBAc.jpg

We have three, Grey, Misty and Yoda.

https://i.imgur.com/JssT8s0.jpg