Shacknews LoL

igfuckingnore

[deleted]

The problem with a phone call like that is that you're sitting at work now with not a whole lot to do and your mind is racing. You're thinking of all the wild, crazy, dirty, freaky, nasty-von-nasty shit you're going to do to your woman when you get home and that shit is just adding up in your head. You're thinking about her standing in the kitchen butt naked in a pair of stiletto heels holding a philly cheesesteak in one hand and stein of your favorite brew in the other hand and you're trying to figure out just how many ways you can bend and twist and turn her shit out and eat the sandwich and drink the beer at the same time and it's difficult because like you said you're sporting mega boner over there and all the blood that would usually be flowing around in your brain is doing hot-laps in your pants. Meanwhile she's off getting her shit down at the office. Unlike your easily-distracted ass, instead of dwelling on how she's going to make you erupt like old fucking faithful tonight she's wrapping up whatever shit she needs to get done at the office. You see, she got all the hot-and-bothered out of her system by teasing you with that phone call. Hearing your voice quiver in your cubicle as she said shit that made your toes curl up in your argyle socks was all the pick-me-up that she needed to power through the rest of today.

Now instead of following up on that steaming hot 'ooh you know your little ass-gaping fuck-slut has been a very, very bad girl and she needs to be punished tonight you should give her a spanking' phone call on the drive home, you're going to be greeted with the 'we catch up on Grey's Anatomy tonight now that the season 3 discs came from Netflix and can you pick up some milk on your way home it totally slipped my mind and I have that thing with Joanne and her sister in like an hour there should be leftovers in the fridge love you hon see you at like 10 or so' text message that you'll get at 4pm. And your confused ass is going to try to allude to the morning's conversation in your reply and it will be like you are talking to a complete and total stranger who thinks that you need to stop playing around and bring home a damn carton of milk. Lowfat 1%. Because it's on sale. We're not made of money, you know. In order to soften the blow you need to do what so many of us in the situation that you're about to be in have done. You need to handle mega boner yourself and blow a load at lunch so that you can approach tonight's disappointment with a clear head. Trust me on this one. Learning how to deal with the soul-crushing disappointment of not getting nearly as much sex as you were lead to believe you would is a necessary step in keeping a healthy relationship. Follow me on this one... You crank out a hot one at lunch, so that you don't get mad when you get that text message at 4pm and you don't argue about it when you get home and she doesn't bitch at you for only being interested in 'one thing' and she doesn't clam up on your ass like a frigid Fort Knox for the next three months including that week off that you have at the end of July to go to your friend's parents' beach house on the coast and you don't do something stupid like start sizing up that plain-looking chick that works in HR with the pseudo lazy eye because she's got a nice rack and look at you sitting there in your cubicle fantasizing about ugly women now. That's some pathetic shit.

You should have just gone home and jerked off at lunch and maybe you could have kept a little dignity.


Pitiful.

Religion is a pox on society.

All this shit aside, Man in the Briefcase was on the twitch chat often when I fell down the stairs a year and a half ago and landed in the ICU. He asked about my health every time I came on stream and it meant a lot to me. I wish him the best.

Post 1 of ?? damn post limit!


As a barely gaming anymore neckbeard, with a love of pedantry, it's very critical to me that articles beseeching my good name are factually correct!



1, Grand Theft Auto 5, is infact one of the top 3 games of all time, not top 10. It's wonderful thing, one of the few things that bring this grumpy bastard some joy.
2, Demons Souls I've never played! Just watched video of it, I do love the heck out of Dark Souls though.
3, I do not hate dogs! I really dislike barking dogs and irresponsible dog owners. I especially don't dislike your dog! That tweet about your dog was genuinely meant to be fun, tell me your little pal doesn't look just like that little straw basket? Seriously? I truly don't hate your dog, at all, I *genuinely* don't.
4, I Sadly don't watch any GiantBomb content anymore and haven't watched any in well over a year, I've listened to about 4 podcasts in 18 months! I'd actually say I'm a little over them sadly, but feel bad saying it!
5, CP2077 is, I think in my opinion, a grade A example of me, somewhat apologising and walking my steps back. Since the launch of the game it's come to light that the company entirely dropped the ball and I've effectively ragged on the game for the month since?
6, I didn't "celebrate" not supporting the shacknews twitch channel, I simply don't consume much gaming video media, twitch feels an active, live "at the time" thing to watch, whereas youtube, regular TV can be consumed Tivo style when you like. I realised after the post, heck I've seen a lot of twitch at the top of the shack, that's literally the only place I see it!
7, I have no idea how you pegged me on most of my kinks but I must say you're close enough to get a gold star. I feel truly sorry for my wife here. I'm more kinky than this site may ever know and I'm stuck with that.
8, Witcher 3. It's such an amazing game and I love it, this is an example of happy abrasion, praising something. If anything ever does make it to my good side and obviously few things do, they get praise. This game is worth it, please try it, it brings me joy.




Realtalk though:

I'm an opinionated asshole, very opinionated and I like to challenge people and show differing viewpoints, I know it's not much of an excuse but my whole family is like this (yes, seriously), I was literally brought up with dark british, cynical humour and a lot of 'picking on people'. It's quite negative, sometimes hilarious but it can miss unless you've been immersed in it. We often argue the most idiotic points, for the fun of arguing with one and other, or who can say the most outlandish shit.



I do think pulling out quote replies from 8 years ago isn't ideal to be honest.
Referencing my wife is a little much, she's almost entiely the opposite of me, she's very sweet, very kind and thoughtful, positive and patient, she has to be, to be with me, my god does she have to be. So that's a little over the line to be honest as is divorce comments, she did recently bang Keanu in a dream though, so perhaps you're on point!

It also seems clear from the article, that there's genuine animosity and I can't say I blame you, but please don't take my whinging and critcism as hate or dislike towards the site or the staff or especially yourself, in any way, at all. I love this site and I've loved it since I was 18 or 19. I will never forget being perma'd by a vindictive mod and how desperately, I wanted to call, speak with Steve and explain "hey, wait! no! I'm actually not that insane, sorry!!" it was a rough time without this site, my internet home away from home. To the mods who unbanned me after begging (and I do know some of you regret it from the mod board leak) thank you and thank you for enduring my bullshit over the years and applying the rules (at least in my opinion) generally quite fairly. I appreciate you guys dealing with my ,.... personality.



People defending me that's very kind but let's be real I deserve a good fucking ribbing after 20 years, it's on me. I'm a ...'unique' poster I'm sure. I just do wish it had been a quite a bit more light hearted in spots. (I am glad where I work isn't known!)

[deleted]

After the Constitution was amended in the wake of the Civil War, slavery was ended as an institution but those who were freed from bondage were still limited in their choices. Many who did not end up sharecropping worked in menial positions, such as servants, waiters, barbers and railroad porters. These were pretty much the only occupations available to them. For restaurant workers and railroad porters, there was a catch: many employers would not actually pay these workers, under the condition that guests would offer a small tip instead.

“These industries demanded the right to basically continue slavery with a $0 wage and tip,” Jayaraman says.

https://time.com/5404475/history-tipping-american-restaurants-civil-war/

Europeans: why do you do this dumb tipping thing instead of paying living wages?
Americans: well you see it actually incentivizes good work!
Europeans: but the research says that’s not true, plus wouldn’t that be the case in every industry where you do paying living wages?
Americans: ok you got me, we just really hate black people, but you already knew that from our broken healthcare, housing, education and drug policies

Biden and Harris is the choice this time. You can write and write and write and you can gnash your teeth about the pathetic choices we're being given in usual elections, but this one is so easy it's not even worth this much emotional energy (from you). Trump is simply unacceptable. Joe is so old that he will likely not run for re-election. He refers to himself as a transitional candidate because he realizes the party that he came up in is gone and has been replaced with something more progressive. But he could literally be drooling on himself on stage and he would be an easy choice over Trump for anyone with a functioning heart. Trump is a cancer on America. Biden is an old white dude who isn't progressive enough to tick all of your boxes. This should not be an emotional process for you, it's the easiest vote you will EVER cast.

I fucking hate him