It's now time for the easiest joke of the day! "Want a Duke Nukem Forever patch that adds a handful of features, including the ability to carry up-to four weapons? Well, come get some!"

Now that we've covered that: Gearbox has announced that the recently promised patch for the PC version of Duke Nukem Forever is now available. The Steamworks-enabled title should automatically update upon the launch of the Steam platform.

According to the official patch notes from Gearbox, the following changes and fixes are coming to the PC version of the game.

• 4-weapon inventory option for single player

• MP Server favorites

• Dedicated server overhaul

• FOV can be modified

• Change VOIP to push-to-talk (bandwidth fix)

• VAC anti-cheat system enabled

• Support for Japanese Steam ID’s for PC release in Japan

• Auto-aim fix

• Blood effects on surfaces behind enemies when shot

• Steam.exe no longer uses an unusually high amount of CPU

• Texture quality improvements

• Fixes to prevent single player and multiplayer save data corruption

• Leaderboard exploit fixed

• AMD Dual-Core Optimizer no longer automatically installed (fixes rare bugs with Intel processors)

• Crash/compatibility fixes and other minor bugs

No further details for a Xbox 360 or PS3 patch were revealed. The only thing we know for certain that will not be featured in the console patch is a similar upgrade to Duke's weapon inventory slots.