John Cena in Talks to Play Duke Nukem in a Film, For Some Reason
Hollywood came to make movies and chew bubble gum, and they're all out of ideas.
In one of the more ridiculous stories of this young year, The Hollywood Reporter is reporting news that WWE Superstar John Cena is in talks to play the role of his life, Duke Nukem. You read that, apparently Michael Bay's production company Platinum Dunes is producing a movie based on my buddy Duke.
Duke Nukem 3D is touted as one of the most important first-person shooters of all-time, but the franchise had fallen out of favor after the response to the long-awaited Duke Nukem Forever sequel. Apparently Paramount has acquired the movie rights to Duke Nukem from Gearbox Software after a previous deal with Dimension Films lapsed.
This news is baffling considering the Duke Nukem franchise is truly in disrepair and Duke's irreverant and politcally incorrect escapades don't exactly mesh well with the current "Me Too" Hollywood landscape. Platinum Dunes is known for The Purge and Ninja Turtles films that they previously produced for Paramount. John Cena has also found a movie home at Paramount appearing in Daddy's Home 2 and in the upcoming Transformers spin-off Bumblebee. Perhaps this rumor is true, but this all seems unnecessary and stupid.
We last saw a glimpse of our good buddy Duke Nukem in the trailer for Ready Player One, but it would make more sense to see a Duke Nukem game return the King to his throne before taking on Hollywood. We will be sure to follow this confounding story as it develops.
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Asif Khan posted a new article, John Cena in Talks to Play Duke Nukem in a Film, For Some Reason
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Part of the magic of Rambo II was that it was a heartfelt, earnest, and completely non self aware over the top action film. Inconsistent editing, bad acting, cheesy one liners, excessive explosions, etc. So great.
What I want from Duke is something a bit more self aware but still dripped in unrealistic violence like a Van Damm bukkake. I want something like Bad Boys II (a film I didn't appreciate when it came out but have really grown to love) or the first Transformers.
Hopefully they downplay Duke's overly sexualized themes that got overdone in Land of the Babes and Duke Nukem Forever. D3D evolved nicely on the character building from Duke 2, but I think 3DR and co went too far off the rails with him.
Another fun idea might be seeing him portrayed as an ultra macho Forest Gump in that he inadvertently becomes critical to the success of some major achievements and products over a period of time (would probably be licensing hell, though). They kind of alluded to something similar in Duke Nukem Forever and it might be fun seeing that story branch explored. Call it Duke Begins or something.
Also put Duke Begins back in development. :(
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Yeah this is probably the worst time in history to do a Duke Nukem movie. His chauvinistic attitudes were already somewhat uncomfortable, with what's going on in Hollywood right now there's no way this movie gets off the ground unless they change up the character a lot.
Of course maybe that's the angle. I forget who but someone pitched the idea that the plot of DNF would have been better if Duke thought he was still a 90's action movie stereotype but everyone around him just laughed at him and rolled their eyes at his lifestyle, but during the course of the game he proves himself and people realize he is as awesome as he says he is.
Maybe the gig with the movie could be that Duke Nukem is the old cop who's too old for this shit but he doesn't know he's too old for this shit.-
"Of course maybe that's the angle. I forget who but someone pitched the idea that the plot of DNF would have been better if Duke thought he was still a 90's action movie stereotype but everyone around him just laughed at him and rolled their eyes at his lifestyle, but during the course of the game he proves himself and people realize he is as awesome as he says he is. "
the problem is they already made that movie and it's starring Arnold Schwarzenegger and it's called Last Action Hero
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