Want to be cool at QuakeCon? Want to score with the Hooters chicks? Well, me and Huntsman have some tips for you. Do what we say here and you'll just "Own" the tourney! Say Owned as often as possible Want to get ahead in the community? Say owned as much as you possibly can through QuakeCon. When we all went to Hooters a few nights ago, I asked a waitress what she thought about people that said "Owned!" She said, "man, those guys get my shit going! I can't wait for QuakeCon just to be the lucky girl to pluck up one of those handsome fourteen year old devils from boyhood and bring him into manhood." Wow! Invite Steve to Razzoo's A Lot He loves it. He can't get enough of it. Follow Steve Around A Whole Bunch He loves it. He can't get enough of it. Especially if you tell him you run a webpage for him to host, that you want to write news for him because you're so funny, or if you call him sCary. It worked for Huntsman! Don't Forget Your MP3's And Porn There's nothing that will impress the people next to you than this. They'll be like, "How can you be listening to Gettin' Jiggy Wit It without the use of a Compact Disc?" Or, "How did that fake nude of Sarah Michelle Gellar miss the pages of Playboy but make it to your desktop? You sly dog! You own!!!" Tell Everyone Your Thoughts On The Blair Witch Project They all really care. People especially like it if you liked it and call them dumb for not liking it. Also, for people who haven't seen it, you can go "You haven't seen it yet?!?! GOD!!! Where have you been living?!!?" Then talk about the ending to the person right next to them. Ask X to take you to the game company he/she works for Boy, people that work on games love this stuff. When you meet them, just go "Hey dude, can you take me down to X, I've never been there before." If that doesn't work, ask them to take you to id, even if they don't work there. They really love that too. Ask Redwood if he plays basketball He's really tall. Walk into the female game conference and say... "I've got a bucket of fried chicken in my pants, anyone wanna get greasy?" You'll get a chick in no time! ... and lastly ... Play EverQuest The Whole Time You freak.